Well, hello there. And how are you doing on this fine Tuesday afternoon?

I'm doing very well. I had poison ivy on my right arm, but I got so sick of it that Saturday night I took a rag and just scrubbed the skin off. Yes, I know that sounds gross, but seriously, it feels much better. Pain, to a certain extent, can be ignored and lived with. Itching cannot. I would much rather have a moderate pain than a moderate itch.

Saturday we went to the G's for Brittany's graduation reception (the same Brittany of the previous post). We had a real good time and ended up staying a good deal longer than planned.

This Saturday is going to be very busy. First is the CHEF graduation at ORU (I've got four friends who will be graduating there...no wait...five or six). Then we'll be going to a wedding that afternoon. And then we'll be going to a graduation reception for another friend that night. So it will be an interesting day for us.

I'll probably be getting my driving licence in early June. That will be really cool. I'm still looking for work. It's supprising how many people are not hiring for the summer. As soon as I graduate (sometime in the next couple weeks) I'll be able to re-apply at Centralift, were I would REALLY like to work.

I'm not going to be able to go to college this fall. I simply don't have the money for it. So I'll be spending the next year working as much as I can re-apply for some of the academic scholarship that I didn't get this time. I'll probably start taking some CLEP test as well, so hopefully I can get a few hours of my general credits out of the way.

When I first came to that discision (put off college for at least a year) I was feeling pretty despressed about it. Until I realized that I'm not actually behind the curve: I'm simply taking the curve backwards! Most people go to college and then work to pay for it. I'm going to be working to pay for it and then going to college. So I'm not such a total failure after all! :)

In fact I'm starting to really look forward to this next year. I'll get to do a bunch of stuff that I've been wanting to do. I'll be able to make some of those short films I've been wanting to do for years. I'll be able to spend a lot of time working on my karate. Hopefully I'll start going into to Mr. Burnets class on Tuesday, in addition to the Monday night class. I'll probably be able to work at Gymnastics City for another year, something I'm really happy about, 'cause I've got several students who I feel are going to go far, and I want to be there to help them. I'm also really looking forward to summer camps this year, 'cause I've got several level 3's that I'm wanting to bring up to level 4 for next year.

I wrote the following to give to all my friend who are graduating, along with three butterfingers. I thought y'all might enjoy it.

Dear Friends,
So you�re graduating. You�ve probably had lots of people talk about how great that is, and you may even be somewhat excited. Don�t you believe them for a minute. It�s only downhill from here.
First off, graduation is a sign of your growing age. Face it: it�s only a few years until you�ll be needing that walker. While you were in high school you could ignore it, but now you must realize that you�re almost half-way to Over The Hill.
With your age come the health problems. And rest assured that the prices for your drugs will only go up. I recommend that you begin laying plans to rob a bank sometime soon, before you�re too decrepit to do it.
Of course you couldn�t be graduating at a worse time, either. Any job you try to get has either been outsourced, or already taken by an illegal alien. You might want to go ahead and get some of those unemployment forms and start filling them out.
With this step toward independence (and don�t even get me started on independence!) comes the pressure towards marriage. Everyone expects it of you, and they will bug you about it until you give in. I suggest that you just resign yourself to the inevitable and pick a random name out of the phone book.
Lots of you will be going to college soon. Man, it�s really going to get bad for you guys. You might as well start practicing for it now. Eat only one small meal a day. Stay up until 3:00 am every night staring at something written in Greek (that�s about how much sense your textbooks are going to make). Now write a 400 page essay on it. Or maybe it�d be faster if you just went ahead and shot yourself in the head.
The 21st century is probably the worst one you could be alive in. It won�t be long before the ice caps melt, leaving only 40 square feet of ground above water for the Earth�s 6 billion people. Of course if you want to look at the bright side, at least your job won�t be outsourced anymore.
In recognition of your achievement I�ve given you three Butterfingers in a plastic sack. This is highly symbolic. Butterfingers represent the fact that you will be fighting cavities for the rest of your unhappy life. The plastic bag represents the fact that everything is now bio-degradable, except for things you want to go away, like liberals. They�re here to stay. And the number three represents the fact that I am too cheap to buy you four.
Dejectedly yours,
Samuel